The Final Flight of The Falcon


You know what they say, “what happens at the Polish Falcon, stays at the Polish Falcon, mostly because reliable sources of electricity and communication are spotty in Riverwest.” Unless, of course, what we’re talking about is Trivia scores. Nothing gets leaked as much as trivia scores, maybe a Beyonce album.

Anyway, Polish Falcon part dos went off last night. And it was none other than the Tunnel Snakes Global Mining and Terrestrial Exploration Concern, Inc. taking home first place. The put up 70 points, which was just enough to knock Johnnie Carries The Team and their 69 points into second place.

In third place it was Tits & Giggles, but let’s be straight about what happened last night. They scored 92 points, which was way more than enough to win. They then voluntarily took a 25-point deduction for extra players. I don’t know if they deserved the deduction as these extra players were just feral Riverwest dogs or raccoons, or like a dead opossum they found in the gutter, which they stacked up, wrapped in a trenchcoat and propped up in a chair. Pretty sure one of these creations had dirty syringes for fingers. Wearing one baby shoe they found near the dumpster behind Mad Planet. Bon Iver pins for eyes. It was horrifying. They ended the night with 67 points.

Princess Leia Demogorgona keeps crushing the competition in the naming category. Honestly when I first saw this iteration, I wasn’t okay with it. But then I read it aloud and I was right back on their side. Well played. Too bad your 62 points gives you nothing.

Finally it was Beerology, who clearly came for the bowling, they scored 59 points. But, I think their time is coming. Yes, I believe we are on the verge of the prophesied ascension of Beerology.

Sadly, that ends Wisconsin’s Hardest Trivia’s short stint at the Polish Falcon. Starting next Monday, April 24, we are heading to Company Brewing at 735 East Center Street.

But before that starts up, we do have our regular Thursday night Madison show. You can catch me and all the Madison heavy hitters. Making a bunch of 420 jokes at Glass Nickel Pizza on Atwood. We’ll be in the basement, and as always, the show starts at 7pm.
See you there.


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